Exclusive! Anderson Silva Reveals What Maia did to "Disrespect" Him

The question on everyone's lips following Anderson Silva's rendition of the "electric side" in his title defense against Demina Maia: was what did the challenger do to disrespect Silva so much to warrant a mutual disrespectin' in front of hundreds of thousands of people?

Did Maia pull a Tim Sylvia with Anderson's girl? No.

Did Demian insult Silva's heritage in the middle of a world cup game? No.

What was it?

Well, WKR has EXCLUSIVELY learned what caused Anderson Silva to demand a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T from Maia.

A week ago, during a press junket in Abu Dhabi, Demian Maia sneezed without covering his nose in Silva's presence.

Such a disgraceful failure to display common decency and manners was an affront to Anderson's skills as a tennis player, which, the UFC middleweight champion, reportedly engaged in on the morning of the fight.

Worse yet, Anderson Silva attempted to say "god bless you" but Demian beat the champ to the punch saying "excuse me". For those unaware of Brazilian culture, saying "excuse me" before a gazoontite is the equivalent of saying "I want to sleep with the corpse of your dead grandmother".

In early 20th century Brazil, such an action by Maia would have warranted a public Brazilian bikini waxing in front of the local populace with perpetrator being forever banned from partaking in carnival.

Thus, Anderson Silva had no choice but to swing, juke, jive, taunt, dance and do the Macarena for fifteen minutes, in order to humiliate the man that broke this sacred social contract of trust between all Brazilians, nay, human beings.
MMA fans should be proud that they have a pound-for-pound king so supremely talented that he can successfully embarrass a man who violates the code of common decency. Such defense morality and honor  has long been missing in our society.

For those that haven't figured it out yet, this is satire.