Dana White bans LeBron James Free Agency Talk
by Zak Woods on Jul 1, 2010 10:48 AM EDT
in Satire
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(I will not have your free agency talk ruining UFC 116!)
Las Vegas, NV (USA) - As the world prepares for battle of the behemoths in the BIGGEST title fight since the last one, the Ultimate Fighting Championship® made a surprise proclamation at 12:01am last night that will shake the very foundations of the sports world. UFC President Dana White confirmed to WKR that he was placing a ban on discussing LeBron James free agency until Sunday.
"This decision was pretty simple for me," White said. "LeBron James and the talk surrounding this Mega NBA free agency is completely dominating the sports media. If UFC 116 is going to come close to UFC 100 we need to stop this mind numbingly frustrating speculation. It's worse than those World Cup horns we banned for no reason other than to piggy back on World Cup coverage. Look, I'd rather have tea and crumpets with Tito and Jenna then have to listen to every media market talk about 'where's LeBron going?'. Well, on second thought that would probably help promote the fight. Hey NBA owners, get LeBron out of Akron and in Vegas!"
If you haven't figured it out yet it's satire.
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"i would rather hear 15,000 vuvuzelas than hear lebron free agent talk"
“And id rather get punched in the face by brock lesnar than hear 15,000 vuvuzelas.”
“But id rather eat crumpets with barry sanders than get punched in the face by brock lesnar”
“Does it smell like glue and spray paint in here to anyone?”
Even a broken clock is right two times a day.
by Chris Toffer on Jul 1, 2010 10:56 AM EDT via mobile reply actions
It’s worse than those World Cup horns we banned for no reason other than to piggy back on World Cup coverage. Look, I’d rather have tea and crumpets with Tito and Jenna then have to listen to every media market talk about ’where’s LeBron going?’.
Spot on. I loled.
Well, anybody who knows me knows I'm no fan of dictionaries or reference books. They're elitist. Constantly telling us what is or isn't true. Or what did or didn't happen.
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